Since A is now one, I guess I am now officially an extended, tandem nurser! Woohoo! K is two and will be three in November and still nursing. I recently had someone ask me how I decided to nurse him for so long. Really, it wasn’t a one time decision that I made. It was several smaller decisions made along the way. Many people decide to stop nursing at twelve months and are surprised when I tell them I don’t plan to wean A any time soon. Those same people are generally even more surprised to find out that not only will I not wean A soon, K is still nursing, too. :

Since I decided to put a link to my website in my Facebook page, I thought now is as good a time as any to answer some of those questions. I don’t feel like I need to defend my decision, and I’m not trying to tell anyone else what they should do for their family. I simply like to talk about breastfeeding and other parenting issues. Thus, I have a blog pretty much dedicated to doing just that!

When K was born, I had my share of struggles learning to nurse him. He was early. He needed a shield to latch. He didn’t latch for the first several days of life. He had jaundice. He was a sleepy baby. I am sure there are a couple others I could list, but luckily, those first weeks have faded a little in my memory and now I remember them mostly with rose colored glasses. My first goal was to nurse him for 6 weeks. Once I made that goal, my next goal became three months. Once I made that goal, I decided to go big and made my goal twelve months. Well, by the time K was a year old, I was pregnant with A. I knew that statistically most babies will wean during a mother’s pregnancy. I also knew that K still depended on nursing for comfort and nutrition throughout the day and sometimes through the night, too. I figured that since 70% of babies wean during a mother’s pregnancy, he would too, and I would let him decide when that time was instead of deciding for him.

Well, as my pregnancy progressed, K still seemed to need “mommy milk” in a very real way that wasn’t met in any other manner. I can’t say that nursing while pregnant was the easiest thing I have ever done or the most comfortable. However, it was something I did for K because he needed, wanted, and liked it

K was 20.5 months old when A was born. At that point, being able to nurse both K and A was a tremendous help in the transition from one child to two. K was still very young and still needed a lot of mommy time. Because of that, I decided to allow him to continue nursing on demand. I felt as though choosing to have A was a decision that Jason and I made. K had no part in that decision, so I didn’t think that having A should be the reason he was no longer able to nurse. At that point, it became my goal to allow K to choose his own date for weaning. I reserve the right to change my mind in the case of any unforseen circumstances, but at this point, I hope to achieve child-led weaning.

Now, I am currently nursing A who is also past twelve months. Because of the positive experience I have had with nursing K, I hope to also allow A to make the decision of child-led weaning for himself. Also, with A being sensitive to dairy, we won’t be introducing cow’s milk or other dairy products to him for a while. Continuing to nurse him helps me to ensure that he’s getting fats, proteins, calories, and other immunological benefits during his toddlerhood.

What I’ve written are my personal reasons for choosing extended and tandem nursing for my family. There are also several resources that encourage and support extended nursing. If you are interested, here are a few:

Extended Nursing Fact Sheet

Are there health benefits to nursing past one year of age?

Breastfeed a Toddler- Why on Earth?

Breastfeeding Beyond a Year

Breastfeeding and the Use of Human Milk (AAP)

Pediatricians and parents should be aware that exclusive breastfeeding is sufficient to support optimal growth and development for approximately the first 6 months of life and provides continuing protection against diarrhea and respiratory tract infection. Breastfeeding should be continued for at least the first year of life and beyond for as long as mutually desired by mother and child.

The World Health Organization’s infant feeding recommendations

As a global public health recommendation, infants should be exclusively breastfed(1) for the first six months of life to achieve optimal growth, development and health(2). Thereafter, to meet their evolving nutritional requirements, infants should receive nutritionally adequate and safe complementary foods while breastfeeding continues for up to two years of age or beyond.

Maybe instead of my post being called Wordless Wednesday, I could call it Wordy Wednesday.

It seems like I always have 4 or 5 great ideas for blog topics while I shower in the evenings. Then, I get out of the shower and *bam* they’re gone! Instead of one of those great thought provoking blogs, you get this tonight.

Since A was born, I can say that my errand runnings and general outings have decreased. Some had to do with weather, but a lot of it has to do with the logistics needed to get two kids ready, navigate nap and lunch time, and get in and out of the carseats several times.

So, I needed to go to the post office. I had three packages to send. I needed to return some books I borrowed from a friend, send some cloth diapers to a friend, and return a bag I bought on Etsy. First, we went to Target. That went relatively well, but my hands were pretty well frozen by the time we got into the building. K was cooperative, and A tolerated the stroller better than expected. We got back into the car and went to the post office. I felt like I was in a competition at the post office. I had to address the packages, pack the stuff up, and seal it all. Then, I stood in line, and paid for all my stuff and the postage for it. Just as I was finishing up, A decided he had enough. He started to complain. Luckily, I was able to wheel my stroller out to the car and get him in there before he started a full protest.

I thought I deserved a mocha or a latte from Starbucks for all my work, but since I’m still dairy free, I decided to pass. Making them with soy milk doesn’t hit the spot in the same way as whole milk does. I guess knowing that we did it and we all survived will have to be my reward.

Well, I did the elimination diet for a few days, and I saw no results. I ate only chicken and rice. To be honest, I don’t even really like chicken all that well (unless it’s a spicy chicken sandwich from Wendy’s with mayo on it), and now the thought of that chicken makes me a little queasy. Yuck.

So, fortunately, it appears that A does not have food allergies (other than the previously mentioned dairy allergy or sensitivity). This means he won’t have to spend his life analyzing every bite that enters his mouth and wondering if he is going to have reaction or if it will be okay. I won’t have to dress him in a shirt that say, “I have severe food allergies. Please ask my mommy before you give me any food” at family gatherings.

Unfortunately, we really don’t have any leads on the fussiness, restlessness, or lack of sleep. I feel like I’m walking a line. On one hand, if there’s something that is wrong and bothering him, I want to know. On the other hand, if he’s simply not a good sleeper, and he never will be, I hate to drag him from one appointment to another, from one diet to another, and from one technique to another. I guess I have to decide at what point I just need to sit back and be okay with not knowing why he doesn’t sleep and why he cries. That’s a hard thing for a mom though.

When I started NaBloPoMo, I was a sporadic blogger at best. At worst, I sometimes let my blog go for *cough* months *cough cough* without writing anything. After NaBloPoMo, I was pretty energized as far as blogging goes. I saw how quickly and easily I could put something up. I liked the feedback I got from comments and friends and family. What could stop me from blogging 20+ times a month, right?

My son.

I’m not trying to say that in a mean way. He is simply a high needs baby, and he takes a lot of time and energy to parent. If you’ve read my previous blogs, you know that I’ve been dealing with a dairy sensitivity and some sleep issues. Well, we are still dealing with the dairy sensitivity and sleep issues. I have tried a few times to introduce dairy back into my diet with the same results each time. A cries and screams while arching his back for 30-45 minutes. Not worth it. The sleep issues have changed a bit though. When A was younger, I was often up with him for 30, 45, 60, or 90 minutes while he was figuring out that night just isn’t the time to be up and play. Thankfully he seems to have realized that night isn’t a good time to play and be up. He has, however, gone from waking 2-4 times a night to waking 7 times or more.

In talking with some other mom friends of mine, they suggested that since he has a dairy sensitivity, he may also have other sensitivities that affect his sleep. For a few months now, I’ve considered this and ignored the possibility. I finally decided to do something about it. Unfortunately for me, that something is the Elimination Diet. So, for the past 2 days, I’ve eaten nothing but chicken and jasmine rice. I’ve had nothing but water to drink. My mom friends told me that if this was going to be something that worked for A, I would notice results in 1-3 days. Well, last night, we did not notice any results. I’m hoping for some sort of change tonight.

In all the information that I read about the elimination diet, I have read that it takes up to two weeks for it to work. To be honest, I don’t know if I can do chicken and rice only for two weeks. I don’t love chicken, and I’m starting to hate rice (well, not hate). I am not really sure what to do, though. I can’t keep getting up with him five or more times a night (Jason usually gets up the other 2-3) and parenting both him and K during the day, but I also don’t know if I can survive while tandem nursing if all I’m eating is rice and chicken. It doesn’t seem healthy for long term nutrition.

So, that’s mostly why I haven’t been all that active on my blog. Hopefully, I will be able to increase my posting frequency as A gets older, starts solids in the next month or two, and gives me some cute funny stories to post.

Well, it’s been three months now, that I have been regularly avoiding dairy. I started when A was about three over four weeks old, we started noticing that his evenings were very fussy, and sometimes he was crying inconsolably for well over 30 minutes. I had been talking to my sister-in-law about her baby who is just four days younger than Asa. She said that she noticed when she had a Dairy Queen Blizzard, her baby was much fussier. I thought about it, and I realized I ate and drank a LOT of foods with dairy in them. I decided to start avoiding dairy to see if we’d notice a difference. We did almost immediately. In the beginning, though, I struggled to find foods to eat that were dairy free since so much of my diet had revolved around dairy.

We suspected that A’s issues included a dairy sensitivity, but he also has some reflux to deal with. Once we felt we had the reflux under control, I tried a few times to introduce dairy back into my diet, and each time it was met with crying, fussing, and tummy aches. Poor guy. So, each time, I immediately elminated it again with positive results.

Now, we’re three months down the road from the initial decision for me to avoid dairy. A is much happier, and I am shocked that one can survive without things like ice cream, cream of mushroom soup in casseroles, ice cream, milk in cereal, and ice cream. I’m hoping that for his sake, it’s only a sensitivity and not an allergy and that he will outgrow it soon.