Maybe I Need to Reevaluate
As many other parents of preschoolers find, I have discovered my children do not eat everything I offer them. Yes, I know, not completely shocking. Although they are beautiful and sweet and intelligent, they are not perfect. I have often referred to my kids as picky when I talk about their eating habits with others. I’m wondering if I need to change my perspective on that, though. Are they picky? What is a picky eater? Is it a child who won’t eat healthy foods? A child who only eats a few foods? A child who won’t try new foods?
At our house, breakfast is a several hour event. For breakfast, the boys often start out with a bowl of grapes, an apple, or some other type of fruit that we have in the fridge. Then, round 2 is usually a grain like pancakes, toast, or cereal. Round three is fruit again. Lunch is usually pretty simple. We often have macaroni and cheese, sandwiches, or soup with more fruit and fresh, raw vegetables (bell peppers, carrots, cauliflower, or broccoli). The boys will usually eat sugar snap peas and green beans, too, if we have them. Supper is where the “pickiness” comes in. A often refuses to even try any of the meals I make. He will usually eat all the ingredients separately (cheese, tortillas, lentils, salsa, chips) but won’t eat them together (lentil tacos with chips and salsa). K will usually try one bite of whatever I make. He often says he likes it. Then, he proceeds to eat only the fruits and veggies and breads that are available.
Earlier this week, I asked an online friend if she had any thoughts on this topic. After thinking about what she said, talking with some other friends, and watching my children’s choices, I’m wondering if I am too concerned about this. Many parents work daily to get their children to eat fruits, veggies, and proteins. I am working to get my kids to combine these foods into what I consider to be meals. Is it really a problem if I have to leave some sweet potato and some chickpeas out of the soup instead of serving them as a soup to the boys? Should I really worry if they don’t want chili but will eat the beans, veggies, and bread?
I’m starting to think that no, in fact, this is just fine, and probably age appropriate. I’m starting to think that because I don’t have to worry about my kids eating fruit, vegetables, proteins, or whole grains, I should probably stop looking for concerns where there aren’t any.
Are your kids picky? Are you picky? Should we really spend so much time and energy on things that are probably developmental and are probably a stage anyway?
I am truly picky. I have issues with textures and flavors that no adult should have. I eat a lot of cheese/yogurt, breads, potatoes, and far more processed foods (cheez its etc) than I care to admit.
My children? I often joke that the hospital MUST have switched my kids with someone elses’ because they will eat anything in front of them as long as they can eat it “their” way. The ILs always ask will they eat XYZ and I can say, quite truthfully, “Just put it in front of them and tell them its food, it will be eaten.” Sure the pizza cheese and toppings will be consumed first then the crust later, sure the baby will get covered in tomato soup while dipping her grilled cheese…but it gets eaten.
I often even envy them because they are so willing to eat anything. I keep trying to overcome that for myself but part of it is textures and part of it (like veggies) is them feeling so foreign to me! Someone tells me to go get an acorn squash and I am like “A what? How do I know which one to pick? What do I DO with it once I get it? How do I know its cooked?” etc etc…repeat that for most veggies. Veggies in our house growing up were canned peas.…thats pretty much the only thing I remember having as a veggie in the house. I wouldn’t eat peas for the LONGEST time until I discovered (via MIL) the little steamer things for peas..turns out peas, properly prepared, are pretty darn good!
Anyway, sorry for the book! You asked
My oldest (2.5) is VERY “picky” (I prefer to call it finicky…he eats when he is hungry — and if he’s eating, he’s eating us out of house & home, but then he’ll go through spells where he hates even his most favorite foods…) my 14 month old…well, he just eats everything in sight (he’s my GF baby, so it’s hard to keep stocked up on enough food for him!)
I consider myself picky.…my husband…“knows what he likes” — he’s not big into trying anything new (I’ll try new, but i “guarantee you, I won’t like it…” LOL)
Your kiddos sound like they eat great and what they’re doing does indeed sound age appropriate. I think it’s safe to say that if they’re hungry — they’ll eat. If you are able (like you’ve done) to instill the basics of GOOD eating in them (choosing those fruits/veggies over ‘junk’) — I don’t think you have any thing to worry about!
Keep up the awesome work, mama!
i was a picky eater as a child but grew out of it. i didn’t like tomato sauce so my noodles had to have butter instead. I didn’t like mushy cereal so I ate it dry. Now that I think about it, it was a texture thing. I still do not eat condiments at all.
LB is picky in that her tastes change. One week she’ll eat apples like it’s going out of style, the next week she won’t touch them. I try to have a variety of foods that “acceptable” (i.e. nutritious, not empty calories) and run through the list with her. we eventually find something she’ll eat.
As far as meals, I have accepted the fact that I need to leave food separate for her. If I am making a casserole, I save a little bit of everything separately for her. Chicken, peas, noodles, whatever. She’s more likely to eat if she can see what she’s eating. And she repeatedly tells me “no sauce.” Yes, she is my child.